baptisms and group 2 begins to build

so, things are moving forward here on the equator.  while it’s cantatas and baking and shopping and parties in the western world these days, it’s 85-90 degrees and life as usual over here.  ha!  chistmas “day” – that day – is recognized here, but as for a “holiday season,” not so much.  and, after many delays and challenges and things trying to distract, etc., some significant forward motion things are happening.  so, it’s exciting and more reason to celebrate the season because jesus is the reason.    ok, yes, that was quite corny.  whatever.  it’s late.  and here at the hotel where i live, there is still a wedding reception going on on the grounds.  so, no sleep for me for a while, as there is no comprehension of the affects of noise here.

anyway, here are some pictures and stories:

here are the boys “practicing” the drum and getting ready for the celebration and praise time after the baptisms.  actually, it was way cool this evening.  the kids were just so – yay jesus!  seriously.  a bunch of kids were baptized.  and, most of them are around when we have our fellowship meetings.  they listen.  they take part.  so, it was cool to see them choose jesus, be baptized, and then basically “lead” the worship time – spontaneously.

so, the young and the old were baptized.  26 in all.  i had been a bit scared of snakes and creepy crawlies in the water, but that left the moment people started coming forward in excitement and joy.  so, here is katarina.  she is one of the main 7 for okidi. then, here is young denis.  he and his brothers and mom were all baptized.  when we first started, these boys were so sad.  you couldn’t get them to smile no matter what.  i get teary now seeing how they now not only smile, but dance and clap and laugh out loud.  they giggle.  their dad, denis, used to hard-core drink.  but that has stopped.  and, i hope it remains, cause these boys are one of obvious, visible pictures of new life.

before the baptisms that day, we started working with group 2, awhey, to begin construction of their 7 huts.  this group has 5 older, widowed women.  one is missing her hand and has a bullet still in her back from the war.  the other 2 are teenage orphans taking care of younger siblings.  they are related to the women.  one of the guys shared about how he survived the massacre of 200 some people at Atiak camp in 1995.  people were taken out and told to sit in a big circle.  then, the rebels opened fire.  slaughtered.  somehow this kid, alex, survived.  his parents didn’t.  he laid on the ground among the dead for 2 days too afraid to get up.  these kinds of stories are the stories of each person.  they all carry these massive traumas.  so, to start afresh is truly a miracle, and truly a huge change.

the commitment and work and change involved in returning to the village is unknown, so it is a process to walk with them all.  there are issues to work through.  but, it is always cool to see them come together and to see them step up over time.

for this second group, getting water was a challenge, but the boys stayed committed to pump water all day for 3 days to load in the beast and take a couple miles to the village.  after mixing the mud and letting it sit/ferment, the guys then used the molds to make the bricks and lay them out to dry.  it is quite hard work.

so, we will continue week by week doing the next steps in building.  we are also starting the same process with group 3, rwoot obilio, this week.  so, we are working on construction with 2 groups at the same time, while continuing to build relationship and have god-times.  though, it’s all god-time, really.

so, i just bless god so much.  he is our help and our savior and our king.  i am thankful he is with us in all things.  i am reminded of this so much of late.  he’s been teaching me a lot of late, revealing a lot – letting me see more and receive more.     and i just kinda go – you know, he IS ABLE to do all things.  he is stronger than anything – always.  his “ways” of going about helping and healing and doing are not my ways, but they are good.  and, they are there.  i just pray that will be seen by all more and more.  step by step he leads us.  brick by brick he lays the foundation and builds us in him.

hallelujah and amen!

LET NEW LIFE BEGIN…

when we come into relationship with jesus and begin to follow him, we start a new life.  it is life eternal with him.  here in northern uganda, we get to speak this truth to  the people here not only through words, but through literally helping people begin new life, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  real life examples become the reality of god to the people.  i am awed and humbled by the whole thing, really.

it’s not only the work here.  it’s not only seeing smiles and hope appear on people’s faces.  it’s not only seeing strength and purpose arise.  it’s something powerful for and in me.  it hit me so hard this last week about how jesus’ death on the cross IS the punishment for my sin.  yes, i know that is the most basic and obvious thing in our walk with jesus.  but man, i can lose sight of it.  you see, i find it so easy to live punishing myself, or to see things that happen in people around me as punishment for my own wrongdoing.  but that just isn’t true.  that isn’t what i need to be doing.  there was punishment for my sin, yes.  and, it was in jesus’ death on the cross.  i just have to let that sink in.  …

and that brings new life.  it brings a spring to my step and a leaping joy to heart.   so here, i just keep praying that the people here will see and accept the fullness of all these things – that they accept the new life in every way.  bless god!

presentation of oxen to group 2!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Flickr Tags: jesus,uganda

Our Deliverer…comes to Okide Village…to my heart…to all…

i’ve had a lot of amazing experiences in my life.  i’ve been lots of places, enjoy great memories of times with people, and been part of some very cool things.  still, last week i encountered one of those times when what your part of transcends any degree of feeling from the experience.  it’s about living in the moment of doing what you know you were created to do.  i’m not talking about a job or even being in a certain location exactly.  it’s deeper than that.

i studied to be a teacher and was good at it.  i really loved coaching softball and working full time as a youth leader.  it was fun to kind of “produce” events and conferences with CNY.  i could work in a studio and produce music every day and be content and challenged in a good way, like when making the god songs cd.  these are jobs i’ve had or things i’ve done that are very much me.  heck, i get energized to mow lawns, as i did most summers growing up, or do any kind of outdoor work.  i’d be happy to marry a rancher, live in montana, raise horses, and grow things.  seriously.  but, these things remain a bit external.  though i could feel deeply satisfied doing many of these things, they aren’t what make my heart and soul be at peace in terms of my role in the kingdom of god. 

don’t get me wrong, i very much think it’s good to have a job or form of work that excites us and all that.  it’s good to pursue that and live it out.  i’m just saying that there is something that is beyond that, and it propels and motivates us more than any job.  and, it can exist no matter what “job” we do.  i may never again do the jobs listed above, but i don’t really care.  they are not what i am about. 

the first time i was on the rez when i was 15, every time i was with the follow the word people, and last week being with people rebuilding their lives on various levels.  these are the kinds of times i am trying to talk about.  the cylinders of my soul were all running in sync and to full capacity.

maybe this doesn’t make much sense because i am trying to share things that are deeply personal to me – things that may only make any amount of sense to me alone.  but, i have often been so guarded at sharing much deep stuff in my heart anymore, that i am just kind of bursting to share. 

i am bursting to celebrate god and who he is!!!

look, i struggle with this.  i do.  like all of us, i’ve had way too many dark days in my life.  and, i have way too many thorns that plague me at times. 

but on those moments when, despite everything – despite all our own internal struggles – despite the challenges of the situation – despite how the people still go up and down in all they deal with – despite loving and caring about people so much it hurts – despite all the things that remind us we are still in this human world; still, moments of being in union with god’s best simply transcend all that.  that’s all i’m saying.

and that is marvelous.  it is a mystery.  it is a wonder.  it lets us breathe freely.

it’s not about me or anything i am or do.  it’s not about anything external – people or places or beauty or circumstances.  it’s not about our feelings – good or bad, peaceful or stressed. 

it is about god being god – and the moments where we get to experience a glimpse of that in purity, uninterrupted by our human-ness.

so, i watched a group of people who have lived under tremendous oppression for a very long time, people who have lost loved ones and homes and identity and hope and value as a person.  i watched them – despite their fear, despite the unknowns, despite the worry and anxiety – watched them live with faith that god is with them and then just continue to walk.  i watched them smile and help and be struck by the wonder of it all, almost not ready to believe this is happening.  and to see that it is god.

i watched people around them drawn to the spirit of god that was among it all – not because much at all was spoken about jesus, but because his spirit was the fuel for all that happened, and his flame could be seen and felt by those around. 

i listened to the spotty reception, tiny radio station coming from far away in the middle of africa on the old radio hanging from a tree as we made bricks, play rich and mitch … “my deliver is coming, my deliver is standing by.”  and so he is, and so he does.  and every time i get to know that i am somehow blessed to be a part of it despite myself and my resistance and my getting in the way of it in catastrophic ways at times, i encounter the goodness and power and victory of god like never before.

 

Flickr Tags: uganda,resettlement,jesus,holy spirit

doubt or life in the resurrection

most easter focus is on the hope and power of the resurrection.  and man, i am all about that.  big time.  but, as i was reading in matthew the other day, i was struck by the doubt and cluelessness of the disciples.  i was struck at how easy it is to just ignore the hope of jesus – the reality of him – the power of overcoming.  jesus bluntly told peter that he would deny him.  yet, peter didn’t even remember the warning until after the rooster crowed.  peter point blank lied and turned his back on jesus 3 times and didn’t even blink an eye.  he was so far into himself and fear that it took a jolt for him to feel conviction.  what a loser!!  you know?  and then later, when jesus appeared, talk about lack of faith.  they all couldn’t quite believe that jesus was really alive, particularly thomas, as we all know.

so, i could look at all this and just go, “man, what is the point?!  don’t you see?  how can any of us think we could live lives of overcoming, of purpose, of hope, of power in the spirit?  even jesus closest followers sucked at sticking by him.  even they had their “issues.”"

i could let myself think like that.  i could see my own life, and the lives of so many people i know, and just figure that though god is real and the the resurrection is real and all that, we will all still remain with struggles and be losers. 

that is the easy way to think.  it is also the way of thinking – that discouragement and frustration with all the problems in our lives and in the world – that paralyze us in god’s kingdom life.  it is what not only leaves us stuck in our own crap, but it also makes us more prone to settle and not really live out god’s purpose to love him and others with all that we are – in action and in truth. 

so, here’s the thing about peter and all the other doubting, faithless followers.  they didn’t just quit.  they didn’t just fall into depression.  they didn’t just say that they were so weak so what’s the point in doing anything.  they didn’t look at the darkness in their own lives and all around in others and give up.  they didn’t sit on their hands and sink into the seeming comfort of everyday life.

no, they LIVED.  peter wept bitterly to be sure.  but, on resurrection day he ran full speed to the tomb.  and of course, later, peter affirms his love for jesus.  this all leads to peter being the catalyst for the start of the church – the followers of jesus meant to bring life to one another and hope to the world through the core of jesus.  peter and the others lived overcoming lives.

were the disciples perfect after all this?  you know – now that they can see and touch jesus, did that just wipe away all their issues and make a utopian world?  far from it.  peter was probably still a jerk at times – as we see in his relationship with paul and fear to stand up to fundamental jews at times.  problems remained in people.  paul had to address issues with those in his spiritual family.  he and barnabas had a falling out.  heaven was not yet here. 

but, look at the power – the effect – the revolution – the life, that came from these people, men and women, living out the power of the resurrection despite themselves.  you know why….BECAUSE IT’S NOT ABOUT THEM!  IT’S NOT ABOUT US!  it’s not about my strength – or my weakness.  this life following christ is about him and his strength.  i am weak.  i will fall and fail.  i will continue to see crap all around me and feel the pain of these things. 

but i don’t have to live in that.  that is not the end.  it is not all there is!  there is hope.  there is something different.  i can live that not because i make it happen, but because i weep bitterly over my various ways of denying jesus, and then i move on!!  then i continue to live.  i don’t run away.  i don’t give up.  i don’t beat myself up.  i awe at his ability to overcome death and all sin – my sin!!  and, i run to him and then keep living that out with others – for others – for him – because of him. 

and so, that is HOPE, POWER, OVERCOMING, LIFE!  it is real.  it is for me and in me.  it is for you and in you.  may we let it flow and be alive in us with every breath!

 

Flickr Tags: Jesus,Resurrection,Peter,Cross,Easter

overcoming

god you are good – above and beyond al things on this earth.  so much in this world does not make sense in our humanness, but you are god.  just because something doesn’t make sense, that doesn’t mean that you are not in it and that it can’t be part of something good you are doing.  you are holy – set apart. 

and you call us to be holy – to be set apart.  the way we are able to be is through the overcoming power of jesus.  he is victory.  he is grace.  he is power.  a battle rages for the sake of people’s souls, and at every turn, that force tries to suck life out of us.  but god, you are the redeemer.  you save.  you bring us back to yourself. 

and as we live this set apart life, fueled by the power of the resurrected christ, overcoming happens.  radical difference exists.  revolution happens – a radical change to the norm of life.  so god, bring that in my life.  by your blood, jesus, by the power of the testimony of you in me – no matter what, may i overcome. 

and may that overcoming happen in every situation.  be a testimony because of the change you do in unexpected places and forgotten lives.  as you overcome in the least of us, be seen by all.  the glory of your name be honored, and may all and more and more find life in you every day, as we overcome because of who you are and our lives of surrender to you.

Revelation 12:11 (The Message)

^7-12War broke out in Heaven. Michael and his Angels fought the Dragon. The Dragon and his Angels fought back, but were no match for Michael. They were cleared out of Heaven, not a sign of them left. The great Dragon—ancient Serpent, the one called Devil and Satan, the one who led the whole earth astray—thrown out, and all his Angels thrown out with him, thrown down to earth. Then I heard a strong voice out of Heaven saying,
   Salvation and power are established!
      Kingdom of our God, authority of his Messiah!
   The Accuser of our brothers and sisters thrown out,
      who accused them day and night before God.
   They defeated him through the blood of the Lamb
      and the bold word of their witness.
   They weren’t in love with themselves;
      they were willing to die for Christ.
   So rejoice, O Heavens, and all who live there,
      but doom to earth and sea,
   For the Devil’s come down on you with both feet;
      he’s had a great fall;
   He’s wild and raging with anger;
      he hasn’t much time and he knows it.

 

Flickr Tags: jesus,revelation,testimony

Fruit

so, i was reading this morning in matthew, and a verse struck me.  “You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act.”  ok, nothing new here, right?  we are known by our fruit.  sure.  it’s just that so often when “fruit” is discussed, we think of it in terms of results – in terms of how many people are following jesus or lives changed because of our lives.  yet here, and in other places where “fruit” is discussed, as i just checked, it really is specifically about our personal actions.  “results” should come of that, but we are responsible for our actions.

think about the fruits of the spirit, what i’ve always called inner fruit:  love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, and self-control.  they are formed in us to create action out of us. 

in john 15, jesus talks about cutting off any branch that does not produce fruit, and pruning back branches so they can produce more.  and again, so often, it’s easy to think of fruit here as what results are shown in the lives of others because of our work.  though, jesus talks about making our home in him and about obedience and about loving others in this passage.  these fruits are about relation to him and about how we then act – how we treat others.

it is obvious when fruit goes bad; it is rotten, sour, rank, wasted, buggy, fermented,  and just plain gross.  and, we become sick when we eat it.   conversely, fruit that is ripe is luscious, appealing, tasteful, beautiful, vibrant, nourishing, alive, and just plain yummy.  we not only enjoy eating it; we crave it and need it for to sustain our lives. 

huh?  so, when we produce fruit, we give something that we need in us, but also, we give to others what they need – to sustain life.  kingdom life is alive and growing by the nutrients of our fruit – of our actions, in how we live and treat others.  huh.

it’s easy to talk about how we treat others.  it’s easy to love those we love (as jesus says).  it’s easy to write a blog post about loving in action.  it’s easy to tell others to be sure that inner fruit becomes outer fruit in how we are.

but, do we ACT on it?  i am challenged by that.  do i live differently?  in that same talk in matthew jesus also talks about doing to others what you would want them to do to you.  he talks about not judging – and that we will be treated as we treat others.  if we are mean to people, the same will come to us.  if we manipulate, people will do that to us.  if we talk bad about others, people will do that to us. 

is the way that i am living producing fruit – is is living differently?  is forgiveness something i live out?  do i love my enemies (not just in words away from them but in action to them) – (and often my enemies are not strangers, but people i know who have hurt me)?  am i rude or am i kind?   am i patient or am i demanding?  do i react to whatever comes my way in the moment or in manipulation or can i bite my tongue and pray and remain silent?  do i honor people or put them down?  do i think i am right and everyone else is wrong and against me or can do i try to see both sides of a story and have compassion for how others are?  do i talk about others or do i keep my information to myself – even when it “seems” ok to talk about something?

wow.  these are things that i must ask myself – these and many others.  i don’t need to “work” to see others follow jesus or be productive in their lives.  i need to choose to follow jesus myself – and put that following into action. 

i want my fruit to be the ripest, sweetest, most nurturing, attractive, life-giving, that it can be.  it comes not from my working to obey, but it comes from making my home in christ and letting his spirit, who lives in me, be the growth that is in me.  then, the obedience and actions follow as they flow from the source of life.

keep moving on

this is a bit of a video journal thing i did while here in northern uganda.  be encouraged!

Psalm 143

A psalm of David.

¹ Hear my prayer, O Lord;
      listen to my plea!
      Answer me because you are faithful and righteous.
² Don’t put your servant on trial,
      for no one is innocent before you.
³ My enemy has chased me.
      He has knocked me to the ground
      and forces me to live in darkness like those in the grave.
⁴ I am losing all hope;
      I am paralyzed with fear.
⁵ I remember the days of old.
      I ponder all your great works
      and think about what you have done.
⁶ I lift my hands to you in prayer.
      I thirst for you as parched land thirsts for rain.
Interlude

⁷ Come quickly, Lord, and answer me,
      for my depression deepens.
   Don’t turn away from me,
      or I will die.
⁸ Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning,
      for I am trusting you.
   Show me where to walk,
      for I give myself to you.
⁹ Rescue me from my enemies, Lord;
      I run to you to hide me.
¹⁰ Teach me to do your will,
      for you are my God.
   May your gracious Spirit lead me forward
      on a firm footing.
¹¹ For the glory of your name, O Lord, preserve my life.
      Because of your faithfulness, bring me out of this distress.
¹² In your unfailing love, silence all my enemies
      and destroy all my foes,
      for I am your servant.

del.icio.us Tags: jesus,uganda,civil war,gettysburg

Flickr Tags: jesus,uganda,civil war,gettysburg

God Healed Me!

Flickr Tags: healing,africa,plantar,back pain,god,motion sickness

So, i realized after being back east just now that i hadn’t shared about how God has healed me of 3 specific, physical things.  i guess they just kinda happened in a way that was part of just the natural of everyday life that, i don’t know, i never really mentioned it to people much – even though i totally have recognized that it was god.

three physical issues have bugged me for some time.  one was plantar faciaitus (heel pain).  this became especially bad in the summer of 2007 – just after returning from africa.  it got to the point that fall where i could barely walk and would even writhe in pain just sitting around.  the pain subsided a bit over time, but i still could not walk distances with any freedom.

the other thing was extreme motion sickness.  i would get car and plane sick.  i was always taking dramamine and then those wonderful 3-day patches.  i could even sit in the front seat and get sick sometimes.  it was really bad.

then, i had a ski accident (well, i was standing at the top and a friend ran into me as she was kinda just starting to move and it flipped me in such a way that i landed way hard on my butt, thus causing great pain in my back).  this back pain or cracked back rib or whatever it was lasted for how long…like 2 1/2 years i guess.  it got a bit better, but especially when i would play my guitar, it would flare up – something about that motion set it off i guess.

so, i had prayed for these pains and nuisances to be gone over time.  then, i asked for prayer for them specifically (for the first 2 anyway) at church before i left for africa this past june.  just felt like i was being obedient to at least be prayed for.  sadly, i can’t say that i had a lot of “feeling” faith.  yet, one of my big challenges was to really begin seeing things with spiritual eyes – in all areas – and believe for god and who he is – not for what i think should or shouldn’t happen in any given area.

so, i come to uganda – not really thinking much about these issues.  and, a few weeks into being here i start to realize…hey, i have FORGOTTEN to take my dramamine.  and, i mean, i ride the crazy taxi-van-things everyday.   and i realize….wait a minute, i wear flip-flops (footwear i could in no way wear the year prior)  ALL the time, as is the custom here, and i don’t feel a thing.  wait, i don’t feel a thing!!!  then, i start to think…man, i have not had my back bother me at all.   and, i play guitar constantly, for hours at a time.

huh.  could it be…jesus?  haha  well, i am thanking and praising god for these healings.  it’s so wild b/c i really couldn’t do what i do here in africa with these things being a problem all the time.  i would be asleep all the time from taking dramamine, indoors all the time cause i can’t walk, and not able to communicate with the villagers b/c i can’t play guitar.  yet, HERE I AM …!  god is here. 

it is way cool and thank him.  and, don’t even get me started on the emotional, spiritual healings and growing ups since taking the step to be here.  they are the same way, though.  i just don’t have the emotional ram (as i call it) living here to carry so many things and issues i used to carry.  i love people and care about people and always desire and am open to reconciliation and god’s best in all things, but i won’t make it here carrying stuff around with me all the time.  seeing with spiritual eyes truly is freeing and healing.  it is up to god to take care of things – not my belief for it, not my trying to make it happen, not anything about me.  it is up to god. 

del.icio.us Tags: healing,africa,plantar,back pain,god,motion sickness,faith